Blog #0265

Sadness filled the whole room as the lil’ hub stepped out of the house. The tears just welled up in my eyes without my knowledge and I began crying again. I just feel sad, for no reason. Or maybe there is… from the after-effect of yesterday’s late night argument that once again, somehow, unlocked the traumatic memories that I feared for years…

The constant nagging and accusations. Like the buzzes of bees, at the door of your ears, continuously and happily singing it’s own tune, which to me, are just noises and noises, and more noises that made my whole world spin, and my mind go crazy.

I knew, for once, I’m not good, again.

I felt exhausted. Just a week of lack of sleep and rest, 2 days of packing, carrying and moving things around without much rest, the constant “arguing” on what to throw and not to throw away, and a hub that doesn’t seem to notice the change in me, and still showed me an attitude face twice in a day, is enough to drive me to the wall.

The tears just flowed… I didn’t bother to stop it… I knew my baby is crying with me but I didn’t have the energy to stop it… I cried too much last night.

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