silent sadness & sianness

i finally told tao tao how sad i am, still, over the death of my goddad…
but i still had to smile ‘cos today is Mothers’ Day (happy mothers’ day). and his family was about to take photos and cut the cake. anyway… i shouldn’t spoil anyone’s mood just because i’m still sad right?
probably not even tao tao…

he sent me home just now.
sent me to my door, then he went home…
i didn’t really wanna persuade or psycho him more to stay over. although i could have. but why would i want to. if he really wanted to, he would already even if just by me asking that few times which i did.
disappointed? ya, probably but i wouldn’t complain. he has his own things to do also. but maybe more sad and disappointed than usual ‘cos… kinda wanted him to accompany me tonight.

can’t let myself idle. can’t let my sianness and sadness show…

i’ll go play neopets now.

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